Ndazalwa ndaza ndakhulela kwimimandla yaseRoma, kwindawo enabantu abangathathi ntweni. Ubomi babunzima. Ndandingamazi oyena mama wam, yaye sasingavani kangako notata. Ndikhule nzima esithubeni.

Xa ndandineminyaka eyi-10 ubudala, ndandisele ndiqalise ubusela. Ndemka ekhaya okokuqala xa ndineminyaka eyi-12. Kangangamatyeli aliqela, utata kwakufuneka aye kundithatha kwisikhululo samapolisa aze andigoduse. Ndandixambulisana nabantu oko, ndinogonyamelo nomsindo kubantu bonke. Xa ndina-14, ndalishiya ikhaya. Ndaqalisa ukusebenzisa iziyobisi nokuhlala esitratweni. Ukuba andinandawo yokulala, ndandiqhekeza imoto ndize ndilale apho de kube sekuzeni kokusa. Kamva ndandiye ndikhangele imithombo yamanzi ukuze ndihlambe.

Ndaba yinkunkqela yesela—ndixhwila iibhegi, ndikwaqhekeza nezakhiwo ngobusuku. Ndaqalisa ukuba negama elibi yaye ndamenywa liqela lemigulukudu elidume ngobubi ukuba ndilithelele. Loo nto yandinika “ithuba” lokungebi kuphela ezindlwini kodwa nasezibhankini. Ngenxa yokuba krwada kwam, ndakhawuleza ndalilungu elihlonitshiweyo. Ndandingahambi ngaphandle kompu wam, ndandide ndiwubeke naphantsi komqamelo xa ndilala. Ugonyamelo, ubusela, ukusebenzisa iziyobisi, ukuthuka, nokuziphatha kakubi kwaba yindlela endiphila ngayo. Amapolisa ayehlala endizingela. Kangangeminyaka ndandingena ndiphuma entolongweni.

Ngeny’ imini xa ndakhululwayo entolongweni, ndagqiba ekubeni ndiye kubona umakazi wam. Kwafumaniseka ukuba umakazi lo nabantwana bakhe ababini bangamaNgqina kaYehova. Bandimema ukuba ndiye nabo ezintlanganisweni zamaNgqina. Ngenxa yokuthanda izinto, ndahamba  nabo. Xa safikayo kwiHolo yoBukumkani, ndanyanzelisa ukuhlala ngasemnyango ukuze ndibone abaphumayo nabangenayo. Ngokuqinisekileyo ndandixhobile.

Ezo ntlanganiso zabutshintsha ubomi bam. Kwakungathi ndiyaphupha. Ndabuliswa ngokufudumeleyo nangobubele. Ndisenawo umbono waloo maNgqina anobubele nabonakala emsulwa. Le meko yayahluke ngokupheleleyo kwimeko yehlabathi endandiqhelene nalo!

Ndaqalisa ukufunda iBhayibhile namaNgqina. Okukhona ndifunda, kokukhona kwacacayo ukuba kufuneka ndiyitshintshe ngokupheleyo indlela endiphila ngayo. Ndalandela icebiso elikwiMizekeliso 13:20 elithi: “Ohamba nezilumko uya kuba sisilumko naye, kodwa osebenzisana neziyatha uya kuhlelwa bububi.” Ndaqonda ukuba kufuneka ndizikhethe kwela qela lemigulukudu. Kwakungelula ukwenjenjalo, kodwa ngoncedo lukaYehova, ndaphumelela.

Kwakhona ndazicoca ngokwasemzimbeni. Emva kokwenza iinzame ezinkulu, ndayeka ukutshaya isigarethi neziyobisi. Ndazicheba iinwele zam ezinde, ndalahla namacici ndaza ndayeka nokuthuka. Okwesihlandlo sokuqala ebomini, ndakwazi ukuzibamba.

Ndandingakuthandi ukufunda, ngenxa yoko kwaba ngumqobo kum ukuzinikela ekufundeni iBhayibhile. Noko ke, ekubeni ndandizama, ndaya ndimthanda uYehova, yaye ndaqaphela ukuba kukho utshintsho oluthile endinalo—isazela sam saqalisa ukusebenza. Ndandiye ndizibeke ityala, ndingaqinisekanga ukuba uYehova angaze andixolele kuzo zonke izinto ezimbi endazenzayo. Ngaloo mathuba ndafumana intuthuthuzelo ngokufunda ngokuxolelwa kukaKumkani uDavide nguYehova emva kokuba wayenze izono ezinzulu.—2 Samuweli 11:1–12:13.

Omnye umqobo yayikukushumayela kwindlu ngendlu. (Mateyu 28:19, 20) Ndandinoloyiko lokuba ndiza kudibana nomnye waba bantu ndabamoshayo! Kodwa ekuhambeni kwexesha, ndayeka ukoyika. Ndaqalisa ukwaneliseka ngenxa yokunceda abanye ukuba bafunde ngoBawo wethu wasezulwini, oxolela kakhulu.

Ukufunda ngoYehova kwandinceda! Abaninzi kubahlobo bam bafa okanye baba sentolongweni, kodwa mna ndonwabile yindlela endiphila ngayo yaye ndisajonge phambili kwikamva. Ndifunde ukuthobeka nokuwubamba umsindo wam. Ngenxa yoko, ndinandipha ubuhlobo obungcono kunye nabantu. Ndonwabile nomfazi wam omhle, uCarmen. Mna naye sonwatyiswa kakhulu kukunceda bantu bafunde iBhayibhile.

Nants’ eny’ into, ngoku ndenza umsebenzi wokwenyani—yaye maxa wambi ndingena nasezibhankini, kodwa kunokuba ndiqhekeze kuzo ndiyazicoca!