Yiya kwinkcazelo

Yiya kwiziqulatho

Ukujamelana Nentlungu Yokufelwa Liqabane

Ukujamelana Nentlungu Yokufelwa Liqabane

IBHAYIBHILE itsho phandle ukuba: Indoda ifanele imthande umfazi wayo ‘njengoko izithanda.’ Naye umfazi umele abe “nentlonelo enzulu ngendoda yakhe.” Bobabini bamele baziphumeze iimbopheleleko zabo ‘benyama-nye.’ (Efe. 5:33; Gen. 2:23, 24) Ekuhambeni kwexesha ulwalamano lwabo luyomelela, ngokunjalo nothando lwabo. Kanye njengeengcambu zemithi emibini ekhula ndawonye, iimvakalelo zesibini esonwabileyo emtshatweni ziyabophana.

Kodwa kuthekani ukuba elinye iqabane liyafa? Kaloku olo lwalamano lomeleleyo nobelungahlukaniswa nto, luyaphela. Iqabane eliphilayo lisenokusala lisentlungwini, lililolo, de maxa wambi lizive linetyala okanye linomsindo. Ukutyhubela umtshato wakhe weminyaka eyi-58, uDaniella wayesazi abantu abaninzi abaphulukene namaqabane abo. * Kodwa emva kokusweleka komyeni wakhe wathi: “Ndandingayiqondi le meko ngaphambili. Akunakuyiqonda de ikwehlele.”

INTLUNGU EBONAKALA INGAPHELI

Abanye abaphandi bathi alukho uxinezeleko olungaphezu kokufelwa liqabane elithandekayo. Abantu abaninzi abafelwe ngamaqabane bayavumelana nala mazwi. UMillie waswelekelwa ngumyeni wakhe kwiminyaka emininzi eyadlulayo. Xa echaza ubomi bakhe njengomhlolokazi uthi, “Ndivakalelwa kukuba akusekho yam.” Wayezama  ukuchaza iimvakalelo zakhe emva kokuswelekelwa ngumyeni wakhe weminyaka eyi-25.

USusan wayekade ecinga ukuba abahlolokazi ababa buhlungu ixesha elide emva kokufelwa ngabayeni babo bayazibaxa izinto. Ngoku sele kudlule iminyaka eyi-20 eswelekelwe ngumyeni wakhe weminyaka eyi-38, kodwa usathi, “Ndimcinga yonke imihla.” Maxa wambi iinyembezi zisuka zizehlele ngenxa yokumkhumbula.

IBhayibhile iyangqina ukuba intlungu yokufelwa liqabane iyamngcungcuthekisa umntu yaye ithatha ixesha. Xa kwafa uSara, umyeni wakhe “uAbraham waya kumenzela isijwili uSara, wamlilela.” (Gen. 23:1, 2) Nakuba wayenokholo kwithemba lovuko, uAbraham waba buhlungu gqitha xa wafelwa liqabane lakhe. (Heb. 11:17-19) Emva kokufa komfazi wakhe othandekayo uRakeli, uYakobi akazange akhawuleze amlibale. Wayethetha kakuhle ngaye kubantwana bakhe.—Gen. 44:27; 48:7.

Sinokufunda ntoni kule mizekelo yeZibhalo? Maxa wambi abahlolo nabahlolokazi baba buhlungu kangangeminyaka. Asifanele sijonge iinyembezi nentlungu yabo njengobuthathaka, kunoko simele sizijonge njengomphumo wokufelwa ngumntu abamthandayo. Basenokufuna uvelwano nenkxaso yethu kangangexesha elide.

NYAMEZELA

Xa umntu eswelekelwa liqabane, ubomi abusuki bubuyele kwindlela obabuyiyo ngaphambi kokuba atshate. Emva kweminyaka betshatile, indoda idla ngokukwazi ukuthuthuzela umkayo ize imkhuthaze. Xa ingasekho, olo thando nentuthuzelo bezifunyanwa ngumfazi azisekho. Ngokufanayo, njengokuba ixesha lihamba umfazi uye afunde indlela yokwenza indoda yakhe izive ikhuselekile yaye yonwabile. Ayikho into enokuthelekiswa nendlela ayibamba ngayo, amazwi ayikhuthaza ngawo, nokunikela kwakhe ingqalelo kwizinto indoda yakhe enomdla kuzo neemfuno zayo. Ukuba uyafa, indoda inokuziva ingento yanto. Ngenxa yoko, bambi abaswelekelwe ngamaqabane baye balixhalabele ikamva, de baloyike. Yiyiphi imigaqo yeBhayibhile enokubanceda bafumane ukhuseleko noxolo?

UThixo unako ukukunceda uyinyamezele intlungu yokufelwa

“Ngoko, musani ukuxhalela ingomso, kuba ingomso liya kuba namaxhala alo. Imini nganye inobayo ububi obuyilingeneyo.” (Mat. 6:34) La mazwi kaYesu abhekisela ngokuthe ngqo kwiintswelo zomntu zokuphila, kodwa aye anceda abaninzi bakwazi ukunyamezela intlungu yokufelwa. Emva kweenyanga ezithile eswelekelwe ngumfazi wakhe, uCharles wabhala wathi: “Indlela endimkhumbula ngayo umfazi wam ayinakuthelekiswa nanto, ibe ngamanye amaxesha iba ngathi ithe chatha. Noko ke, ndiye ndaqonda ukuba oku kuqhelekile ibe ngokuhamba kwexesha intlungu yam iza kude ibe bhetele.”

UCharles kwaye kwafuneka alinde kudlule ixesha. Wakwenza njani oku? Uthi: “Ngoncedo lukaYehova ndakwazi ukunyamezela.” UCharles akazange akhathazeke ngokugqithiseleyo. Intlungu yakhe zange ivele iphele ngokukhawuleza, kodwa naye akazange anikezele kuyo. Ukuba uphulukene neqabane, zabalazela ukunyamezela suku ngalunye  olufikayo. Akuyazi ingenelo nokhuthazo oza kulufumana ngomso.

Ukufa kwakungeyonjongo kaYehova yantlandlolo. Kunoko, kubekho ngenxa ‘yemisebenzi kaMtyholi.’ (1 Yoh. 3:8; Roma 6:23) USathana usebenzisa ukufa noloyiko olubangelwa kuko ukuze agcine abantu bengamakhoboka angenathemba. (Heb. 2:14, 15) Kuthi ngco kuSathana xa umntu ephelelwa lithemba lokufumana ulonwabo lokwenene nolwaneliseko nkqu nakwihlabathi elitsha likaThixo. Ngoko intlungu eviwa liqabane eliswelekelweyo ngumphumo wesono sika-Adam nemvukelo kaSathana. (Roma 5:12) UYehova uya kuwulungisa wonke umonakalo owenziwe nguSathana, aze oyise isixhobo sikaSathana esikhohlakeleyo, ukufa. Abo bakhululwe kuloyiko olusetyenziswa nguSathana baya kuquka abaninzi abaphulukene namaqabane abo ekufeni, njengawe.

Ubomi kwihlabathi elitsha buya kuza neenguqu kwabo bavusiweyo. Cinga nje ngabazali, ooMakhulu nooTatomkhulu kunye nookhokho abaya kuvuswa baze bafezeke ngokuthe ngcembe kunye nabantwana nabazukulwana babo. Imiphumo yokwaluphala iya kube ingekho. Ngaba abasebatsha kuya kufuneka babajonge ngenye indlela ookhokho babo? Ngaba asikholelwa ukuba ezi nguqu ziya kunceda ekuphuculeni intsapho engabantu?

Sisenokuba nemibuzo emininzi ngabo baza kuvuswa. Ngokomzekelo, kuza kwenzeka ntoni ngabo baphulukene namaqabane aliqela? AbaSadusi  bakha babuza uYesu ngomfazi owafelwa ngumyeni wakhe wokuqala, nowesibini, de baba liqela. (Luka 20:27-33) Baza kuba naluphi ulwalamano eluvukweni? Asazi, ibe akukho sizathu sakuzihlupha ngaloo nto. Sifanele nje sithembele kuThixo. Nantsi into esiqiniseke ngayo—nantoni na uYehova aya kuyenza iya kusilungela, ibe kunokuba soyike simele singalahli ithemba.

ITHEMBA LOVUKO—UMTHOMBO WENTUTHUZELO

Enye yezona mfundiso zicacileyo zeLizwi likaThixo yeyokuba abafileyo baza kuvuswa. Iingxelo zeBhayibhile zabantu abavuswayo ziyasiqinisekisa ukuba ‘bonke abo bakumangcwaba enkumbulo baza kuliva ilizwi likaYesu baze baphume.’ (Yoh. 5:28, 29) Abantu abaya kube bephila ngeloo xesha baya kuba nemincili njengoko bebona abo bakhululwe ekufeni. Kwelinye icala, uvuyo lwabo aluyi kuthatha nto kolwabo bavusiweyo.

Njengoko kuvuswa abafileyo, umhlaba uya kuzaliswa luvuyo olungazange lwakhona. Inyambalala yabantu abavusiweyo iya kuphinda idle ubomi emhlabeni. (Marko 5:39-42; ISityhi. 20:13) Ukucamngca ngalo mmangaliso uza kwenzeka kumele kubathuthuzele abo baphulukene nabantu babo ekufeni.

Ngaba uya kubakho umntu oya kuba nesizathu sokukhathazeka xa kuvuswa abafileyo? IBhayibhile ithi akunjalo. Incwadi kaIsaya 25:8 ithi uYehova “uya kuginya ukufa ngonaphakade.” Oku kuquka ukususa ngokupheleleyo imiphumo yokufa, kuba esi siprofeto siqhubeka sithi: “INkosi enguMongami uYehova ngokuqinisekileyo iya kosula iinyembezi ebusweni bonke.” Ukuba ngoku ubuhlungu ngenxa yokufelwa liqabane lakho, ngokuqinisekileyo uvuko luya kukunika isizathu sovuyo.

Akakho umntu okuqonda ngokupheleleyo konke oko uThixo aya kukuphumeza kwihlabathi elitsha. UYehova uthi: “Njengoko amazulu ephakamile kunomhlaba, ngokunjalo neendlela zam ziphakamile kuneendlela zenu, neengcamango zam kuneengcamango zenu.” (Isa. 55:9) Isithembiso sikaYesu sovuko sisivulela ithuba lokuthembela kuYehova, njengoAbraham. Ngoku, mKristu  ngamnye umele enze konke oko uYehova akufunayo kuthi aze ‘abalelwe ekuthini ufanelwe kukuzuza loo nkqubo yezinto’ kunye nabo baza kuvuswa.—Luka 20:35.

ISIZATHU SETHEMBA

Endaweni yokuxhalaba, hlakulela ithemba. Ebantwini, ikamva likhangeleka limfiliba. Kodwa uYehova usinika ithemba lento engcono. Nakuba singayazi indlela uYehova aya kuzanelisa ngayo zonke iintswelo neminqweno yethu, asimele sithandabuze ukuba uza kuzanelisa. Umpostile uPawulos wathi: “Ithemba elibonwayo asilothemba, kuba xa umntu eyibona into, ngaba usenethemba layo na? Kodwa ukuba sinethemba loko singakuboniyo, sihlala sikulinde ngonyamezelo.” (Roma 8:24, 25) Ukuthembela ngokupheleleyo kwizithembiso zikaThixo kuya kusinceda sinyamezele. Ngokunyamezela, uya kulixhamla elo kamva lizukileyo uYehova ‘aya kukunika lona ngokwesicelo sentliziyo yakho.’ Uya kwanelisa “umnqweno wayo yonke into ephilayo.”—INdu. 37:4; 145:16; Luka 21:19.

Yiba nethemba kwisithembiso sikaYehova sekamva esizaliswe lulonwabo

Xa kwakusondele ixesha lokufa kukaYesu, abafundi bakhe babekhathazekile. UYesu wabathuthuzela ngala mazwi: “Ningazivumeli iintliziyo zenu zikhathazeke. Bonisani ukholo kuThixo, bonisani ukholo nakum.” Emva koko wathi: “Andiyi kunishiya nilahlekelwe. Ndiyeza kuni.” (Yoh. 14:1-4, 18, 27) La mazwi ayeza kunceda abalandeli bakhe abathanjisiweyo babe nethemba yaye banyamezele kangangeminyaka. Nabo balangazelela ukubona abantu babo eluvukweni abanasizathu sakulahlekelwa lithemba. UYehova noNyana wakhe abayi kubashiya beselusizini. Unokuqiniseka ngaloo nto!

^ isiqe. 3 Amagama atshintshiwe.