1, 2. (a) Khuyini abatjhadikazi ababa nethemba layo nabaqeda ukutjhada? (b) Esahlukwenesi sizokucoca ngamiphi imibuzo?

AKHUBONE abatjhadikazi ngelanga labo lomtjhado. Bathabile begodu banamabhudango amahle ngekusasa labo. Banethemba lokuthi umtjhadwabo uzokuthabisa bewuhlale isiphelani.

² Nanyana kunjalo, imitjhado eminengi iba nesithomo esihle kodwana ayihlali injalo. Nabazakuhlala bathabile abatjhadikazi batlhoga iseluleko esivela kuZimu. Akhesicoce ngeempendulo ezifumaneka eBhayibhelini zemibuzo nasi. Ziyini iinzuzo zomtjhado? Ungamkhetha njani umlingani omuhle? Ungaba njani mfazi namkha yindoda ehle? Khuyini eyenza umtjhado uhlale isiphelani?—Funda izAga 3:5, 6.

3. Kghani ucabanga ukuthi umuntu kufuze atjhade nakazakuthaba? Hlathulula.

³ Abanye abantu bakholelwa ukuthi angeze wathola ithabo nawungakatjhadi. Kodwana akusiliqiniso lelo. UJesu wathi ukungatjhadi kusisipho. (Matewu 19:11, 12) Nompostoli uPowula wathi, kunenzuzo  ukungatjhadi. (1 Korinte 7:32-38) Kukuwe ukukhetha ukuthi uyafuna ukutjhada na. Akukafaneli uvumele umndeni, abangani namkha isiko lakho bona likugandelele ukuthi utjhade.

4. Ziyini iinzuzo zomtjhado?

⁴ IBhayibheli lithi umtjhado sisipho esivela kuZimu. UJehova wathi: “Akusikuhle bona umuntu ahlale yedwa. Yeke ngizomenzela umsizi omfaneleko.” (Genesisi 2:18) Ngalokho uJehova wabumba u-Eva bona abe mfazi ka-Adamu, baba batjhadikazi bokuthoma emlandweni wabantu. Nakhisibe abatjhadikazi baba nabantwana kufuze babakhele indawo evikelekileko abazokukhulela kiyo. Kodwana umuntu angeze atjhadiswe kukuthi umane uzifunela abantwana kwaphela.—IRhubo 127:3; Efesu 6:1-4.

5, 6. Umtjhado ungaba njani ‘yintambo enemitiya emithathu’?

⁵ IKosi uSolomoni yathi: “Abantu nabababili, banomvuzo omuhle ngomsebenzabo.” Omunye nawako, umnganakhe uyamvusa. Kodwana maye emuntwini othi nawileko, aswele umuntu ongamvusa! . . . . Intambo enemitiya emithathu ayiqhusuki lula.”—UMtjhumayeli 4:9-12.

⁶ Umtjhado omuhle ungaba litjhebiswano elitjhideleneko labantu ababili abasizanako, abaduduzanako nabavikelanako. Ithando lingawuqinisa umtjhado kodwana uqina khulu lokha abatjhadikazi nabalotjha uJehova. Umtjhadwabo uzakuba ‘yintambo enemitiya emithathu’ elukwe yaqina. Intambo le, iqine khulu ukudlula intambo enemitiya emibili. NakunoJehova umtjhado uyaqina.

7, 8. UPowula wanikela siphi iseluleko malungana nomtjhado?

 ⁷ Ngemva komtjhado, abatjhadikazi bangathabela ubudlelwana bokuthokozisana ngokwamabhayi. (IzAga 5:18) Umuntu angabhalelwa kukhetha umlingani ngokuhlakanipha nange afuna ukwanelisa ikanuko yakhe yomseme. Ngikho iBhayibheli liseluleka ngokuthi umuntu angatjhada nasele ‘adlule iminyaka yobutjha,’ okusikhathi lapho imizwa ibanamandla khulu. (1 Korinte 7:36) Kukuhlakanipha ukulinda isikhatheso sidlule ngaphambi kokucabangela ukutjhada. Nasele sidlulile, kubalithuba elihle lokucabanga nelokwenza iinqunto ezivuthiweko.—1 Korinte 7:9; Jakopo 1:15.

⁸ Nawucabangela ukutjhada, kuhle ukulemuka ukuthi yoke imitjhado inemiraro. Ngikho uPowula athi abatjhadako, “bazokuqalana nesizi enyameni.” (1 Korinte 7:28) Nemitjhado ebonakala imihle iyaqalana neenkhathi ezibudisi. Kungebangelo kufuze ukhethe kuhle umlingani.

9, 10. Kungenzekani nange singatjhada nomuntu ongakholwako?

⁹ Nasele usejimeni lokukhetha umlingani, ungathomi ulibale ikambisolawulo le: “Ningabotjhelwa ejogeni linye nabangakholwako.” (2 Korinte 6:14) Naku umfanekiso, akhesithi ufuye iinlwana ezimbili ezingalingani ngobukhulu nangamandla bese uzipanele ndawonye bonyana ziyokulima emasimini. Ayikho into ezokulunga lapho. Iinlwanezi zombili njalo zizokuthwala ubudisi. Kusafana-ke nangomtjhado. Nange kuhlanganiswe umuntu olotjha uJehova nongamlotjhiko,  umphumela womtjhado loyo uzokuba matlhuwo wodwa. Yeke iBhayibheli isiluleka ngamezwi ahlakaniphileko nayithi sitjhade “kwaphela eKosini.”—1 Korinte 7:39.

¹⁰ Ngasikhathi, amanye amaKrestu abanombono wokuthi kungcono utjhade nomuntu ongakholwako kunokuhlala wedwa. Kanengi imiphumela iba buhlungu ngebanga lokuseqisela amehlo iseluleko seBhayibheli. Ukulotjha kwethu uJehova kuphela kwento eqakatheke ukuzidlula zoke! Ungazizwa njani nange kunezinto eziqakathekileko obhalelwa kuzenza nomlinganakho? Ngikho-ke abanengi bazikhethela ukuhlala bodwa kunokuthi batjhade nomuntu ongamlotjhiko uJehova.—Funda iRhubo 32:8.

11. Ungamkhetha njani umlingani ozokutjhada naye?

¹¹ Lokhu akutjho ukuthi woke umuntu olotjha uJehova angaba mlingani womtjhado ovuthiweko. Nakuziwa endabeni yokutjhada, kufuze uthome ngokumfunda kuhle umuntu loyo bewumthande. Linda bewuthole umuntu obeke uJehova qangi ekuphileni kwakhe nozokukhetha imigomo efana neyakho. Thatha isikhathi sakho ufunde bewuzindle ngeenluleko zomtjhado ezilisizo esizithola ngenceku ethembekileko.—Funda iRhubo 119:105.

12. Khuyini esiyifunda eBhayibhelini malungana nokuhlela umtjhado?

¹² Kezinye iintjhaba kuba yinto ejayelekileko ababelethi nabakhethela umntwanabo umlingani. Basuke bakholelwa ukuthi bakwazi kuhle okulungele umntwanabo. Isikweli belisolo lidumile nemihleni yeBhayibheli. Nange ababelethi bakhetha  ukulilandela isikweli, iBhayibheli ingabasiza bazi ukuthi kufuze baqale ubuntu obunjani emntwini. Ngesikhathi u-Abrahamu akhethela u-Isaka umfazi, bekangakaqali ukuthi umfazi loyo bekanjingile na, kunalokho waqala bonyana umthanda kangangani uJehova.—Genesisi 24:3, 67; qala isiPhetho 25.

13-15. (a) Indoda ingakulungiselela njani ukuba yihloko yomndeni evuthiweko? (b)Umfazi angakulungiselela njani ukuba mfazi ovuthiweko?

¹³ Nangabe ufuna ukutjhada, wenze isigiri yokuthi sewukulungele. Kesinye isikhathi ungacabanga  ukuthi sewukulungele, kanti akusinjalo. Alo, nasele ukulungele uzokubona ngani? Ipendulo ingakutjhiya urarekile.

¹⁴ IBhayibheli lithi indoda nomfazi badlala iindima ezihlukileko emndenini. Indaba le seyizwakala kuhle kwanjesi, ngebanga lokuthi nasele uthi ulungele ukutjhada usuke ulindele indima ehlukileko kuye ngokuthi umfazi namkha uyindoda. Nange indoda ifuna ukuthatha, kusafanele izibuze bonyana sengikulungele na ukuba yihloko yomndeni? Phela uJehova ulindele kobana indoda itlhogomele umkayo nabantwana ngokomzimba nangokomzwelo. Idose phambili endabeni yokulotjha uZimu, okuyindima eqakatheke ukuzidlula zoke. IBhayibheli nayihlathulula indoda ebhalelwa kutlhogomela umndenayo ithi “mumbi khulu kunomuntu ongakholwako.” (1 Thimothi 5:8) Indoda ingazibuza godu nokuthi ikambisolawulo yeBhayibheli le ngingayisebenzisa njani ekutheni: ‘Ngincame ngomsebenzami wangaphandle, nginake umsebenzi wamasimami; ngemva kwalokho, ngakhe ikumbami’? Lokhu kutjho ukuthi ngaphambi kokutjhada, kufuze uqiniseke ngokudlala indima yendoda uJehova akulindele ube ngiyo.—IzAga 24:27.

¹⁵ Nomfazi ofuna ukutjhada kusatlhogeka azibuze ukuthi sekayilungele na imithwalo yobufazi nokuba ngumma? IBhayibheli ikhuluma ngeendlela ezinengi umfazi angazisebenzisa ekutlhogomeleni indodakwakhe kunye nabantwana. (IzAga 31:10-31) Namhlanjesi, inengi lamadoda kunye nabafazi into abacabanga ngayo kukuthi bazokutholani  emuntwini abazokutjhada naye. Kodwana uJehova ufuna sicabange ngezinto esingazenzela abalingani bethu.

16, 17. Khuyini okufanele uzindle ngayo nawufuna ukutjhada?

¹⁶ Ngaphambi kokuthi utjhade, akhuzindle ngalokho uJehova akutjho emadodeni nebafazini. Ukuba yihloko yomndeni akutjho ukusuhla umndenakho, kungaba ngokomzimba namkha ngokomzwelo. Indoda enehloko ethathako ilingisa uJesu. UJesu bekaziwa ngomusa nangethando. (Efesu 5:23) Umfazi naye kusatlhogeka acabangisise ngokusekela indodakwakhe eenquntweni ezenzako abe abambisane nayo. (Roma 7:2) Kusafanele azibuze nokuthi uzokukghona ukuzithoba na emuntwini onesono? Nangabe ubona ngenye indlela, kungaba kuhle agoje ahlezi yedwa.

¹⁷ Amadoda nabafazi kufanele baqiniseke ukuthi abalingani babo bathabile kunokuthi bazithabise bona. (Funda kwebeFilipi 2:4.) UPowula wathi: “Ngamunye wenu kufuze athande umkakhe njengombana azithanda yena ngakelinye ihlangothi, umfazi kufuze ayihloniphe khulu indodakhe.” (Efesu 5:21-33) Indoda nomkayo kufuze baqinisekisane ukuthi bayathandana begodu bayahloniphana. Nomtjhado nawukhamba kuhle, umfazi usuke ahlonipha indodakwakhe, nendoda yenza okufanako ithande umkayo.

18. Abaqomisanako khuyini ekufuze bayivulele amehlo?

¹⁸ Isikhathi sokuqomisana siyaqabula nganingoba kulapho abantu abathandanakwaba bafundana khona. Bakwazi ukufumana nethuba lokuqunta into  ekungiyo. Kulapho umuntu abona khona ukuthi uzimisele kangangani ukutjhada nomlinganakhe. Ngesikhathesi bafunda nokukhulumisana kuhle bebazame nokuzwisisana ukuthi omunye uzizwa njani ngomunye. Kungokwemvelo-ke ukuzizwa kamnandi ngomlinganakho ngombana ubuhlobo benu busuke bukhula. Leli ligadango elitlhoga ukulwele ngamandla ukulawula imizwakho. Nakungasinjalo ningazithola senenze ubuhlola. Kodwana ithando lamambala lizonisiza nizibambe ukwenzela kobana  ningoni itjhebiswano lenu noJehova.—1 Thesalonika 4:6.

19, 20. Unjani umbono wamaKrestu ngomtjhado?

¹⁹ Iincwadi ezinengi namamuvi vane ziphethe ngomtjhado othabisako. Kodwana iqiniso likukuthi, umtjhado usithomo sendaba. NoJehova nakahlela umtjhado, wathi uzokuhlala unomphela.—Genesisi 2:24.

²⁰ Izinto sezatjhuguluka, kangangokuthi inengi labantu seliqala umtjhado njengento ezakuhlala amalangana. Kuba lula ukutjhada, kube lula nokutlhalana. Kuthi kungaqubuka umraro, umuntu avulekelwe lithuba lokutlhala umlinganakhe. Kodwana khumbula umfanekiso loya wentambo yemitja emithathu elukwe yaqina. Intambo enjalo angeze yaqhusuka ngitjho nanyana kungaba budisi kangangani. Nathi-ke nasibawa isizo kuJehova imitjhadwethu ingadzimelela. Ngikho uJesu athi: “Lokho uZimu akuhlanganisileko, akungabi nomuntu okuhlukanisako.”—Matewu 19:6.

21. Khuyini engasiza indoda nomfazi bahlale bathandana?

²¹ Woke umuntu kunala afogola khona, kodwana lokho akutjho ukuthi asinamandla. Kulula khulu ukudzimelela emitjhaphweni yomuntu otjhade naye. Ukwenza njalo kuzokudima ithabo. Kodwana nawudzimelela ezintweni umlinganakho azenza kuhle nomtjhadwenu uzokukarisa. Alo, singakghona ukwenza njalo ngomlinganethu onesono? Iye, singakghona. UJehova wazi indlela isono esizenzela  ngayo emzimbenethu. Khonapho usadzimelele ezintweni esizenza kuhle. Besizakubona senzeni thana bekadzimelela eemphosweni zethu? Umrhubi wakhe wathi: Jehova “nabegade ubulunga amacala, ngubani obekangaphila na?” (IRhubo 130:3) Amadoda nabafazi bangamlingisa uJehova ngokudzimelela kokuhle kabatjhade nabo bebafunde nokulibalela msinyana.—Funda kwebeKolose 3:13.

22, 23. Umtjhado ka-Abrahamu noSara waba sibonelo ngayiphi indlela?

 ²² Ekukhambeni kwesikhathi, umtjhado uyaqina. U-Abrahamu noSara besele banesikhathi eside batjhadile begodu bebathabile. Nabafuduka enarheni ye-Uri kungenzeka uSara bekanama-60 ubudala. Mhlamunye bekubudisi ukusukela ipilo emabothobotho ayokuhlala ematendeni. Kodwana umfazabantu lo walinga ngakho koke ukusekela indodakwakhe wabe wayihlonipha. Iinqunto zaka-Abrahamu beziphumelela ngebanga lakhe uSara.—Genesisi 18:12; 1 Pitrosi 3:6.

²³ Ukuphumelela komtjhado akutjho ukuthi indoda nomfazi bazokuhlala bavumelana ngayo yoke into. Kwakhe kwenzeka u-Abrahamu waba nombono ohlukileko kewakaSara, uJehova wathi: ‘Kwenze koke uSara akutjela khona.’ Nembala u-Abrahamu wenza njalo, kwamkhambela kuhle. (Genesisi 21:9-13) Nakwenzeka ningavumelani ngokuthileko nomlinganakho, ungapheli amandla. Ukungavumelani kwenu akukaqakatheki, ikani nanisathandana benihloniphane.

24. Umtjhadwakho ungamthokozisa njani uZimu?

²⁴ Emabandleni waboFakazi bakaJehova, kunabatjhadikazi abanengi khulu abathabileko emtjhadwenabo. Nasele uqunte ukutjhada, usuke uthethe igadango eliqakathekileko ekuphileni kwakho. Igadangweli lizokuthinta yoke into ekuphileni kwakho, yeke bawa uJehova akunqophise. Uzokukghona nokukhetha umlingani ngokuhlakanipha, ulungiselele nomtjhadwakho benihlalisane ngokuthula nithokozise uJehova.