“USophia * wagula ixesha elide waza wasweleka emva kweminyaka eyi-39 sitshatile. Abahlobo bam babesoloko bendinceda, yaye ndandihlala ndixakekile. Kwada kwaphela unyaka ndisentlungwini. Ndandingakwazi ukuyilawula indlela endivakalelwa ngayo. Nangona sekudlule iminyaka emithathu eswelekile, ndikhe ndimane ndikhathazeka kakhulu ndingalindelanga.”​—UKostas.

Ngaba uswelekelwe ngumntu omthandayo? Ukuba kunjalo, usenokuba uyayiqonda intlungu kaKostas. Zimbalwa kakhulu izinto ezinokukwenza ube nestres okanye ube buhlungu kakhulu njengokuswelekelwa ngumyeni okanye inkosikazi, isalamane, okanye umhlobo osondeleyo. Zitsho njalo neengcali eziphanda ngentlungu yokuswelekelwa. Inqaku elikwiThe American Journal of Psychiatry lithi “abantu abaninzi abaswelekelweyo baye bacinge ukuba abasoze baphinde bambone loo mntu, yaye baba buhlungu kakhulu.” Ngenxa yentlungu akuyo, umntu oswelekelweyo usenokuzibuza athi: ‘Ndiza kuba buhlungu de kube nini? Ngaba ndingaze ndiphinde ndonwabe? Ndingancedwa yintoni?’

Le mibuzo iyaphendulwa kulo Vukani! Inqaku elilandelayo liza kuthetha ngezinto onokuzilindela ukuba usanda kuswelekelwa. Amanye amanqaku alandelayo aza kuthetha ngezinto ezinokukunceda ungabi buhlungu kakhulu.

Siyathemba ukuba la manqaku aza kuthuthuzela aze ancede wonke umntu osentlungwini yokuswelekelwa.

^ isiqe. 3 Amanye amagama akula manqaku atshintshiwe.