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UVUKANI! JUNI 2014

 INQAKU ELINGUMXHOLO

Umbona Ngantoni Umhlobo Wokwenene?

Umbona Ngantoni Umhlobo Wokwenene?

NgoDisemba 25, 2010 ibhinqa laseBritani elineminyaka eyi-42 ubudala, labhala ngokufuna ukuzibulala kwiWebhsayithi yokuncokola. Lalibonakala lifuna uncedo. Nangona “lalinabahlobo” kwi-intanethi abangaphezu kwewaka, akukho namnye kubo owalincedayo. Kusuku olulandelayo, amapolisa alifumana eli bhinqa sele libanda, kuba lalisele iipilisi zokuzibulala.

Kule mihla, ngenxa yeteknoloji siyakwazi ukuba namakhulu okanye amawaka “abahlobo,” ngokusuka nje sibameme kwiiWebhsayithi zokuncokola. Yaye xa ufuna ukubuphelisa obo “buhlobo,” kulula ukusuka nje ucime igama laloo mntu. Noko ke, intlungu eyehlele eli bhinqa laseBritani, ibonisa ukuba kusenzima kubantu abaninzi ukufumana abahlobo bokwenene. Ukungqina oko, uhlolisiso lwakutshanje lubonisa ukuba lehlile inani labantu abangabahlobo bokwenene, nangona bebaninzi abakwiiWebhsayithi zokuncokola.

Njengabantu abaninzi, usenokuba uyavuma ukuba kubalulekile ukuba nabahlobo bokwenene. Mhlawumbi uyabona nokuba ukuba ngumhlobo akuphelelanga nje ekucofeni amaqhosha ekhompyutha okanye efowuni. Yintoni oyilindeleyo kumhlobo wakho? Unokuba nguye njani umhlobo wokwenene? Unokubuqinisa njani ubuhlobo benu?

Khawuqwalasele la macebiso mane anokukunceda, uze ubone nendlela enokukunceda ngayo iBhayibhile ukwazi ukuba ngumhlobo wokwenene.

 1. Yiba Ngumhlobo Okhathalayo

Ukuba ngumhlobo wokwenene kubandakanya ukuzinikela. Ngamany’ amazwi, umhlobo wokwenene ukukhathalele yaye uzimisele ukukunceda. Kodwa ubuhlobo obunjalo bufanele buze macala, yaye kufuneka sizibhokoxe xa sibuhlakulela. Oko kuba nemiphumo emihle. Zibuze, ‘Ngaba ndikulungele ukuncama ixesha, amandla nemali yam ngenxa yomhlobo wam?’ Khumbula ukuba, ukuze ufumane umhlobo wokwenene, umele kuqala wena ube ngumhlobo wokwenene.

OKO KULINDELEKILEYO KUMHLOBO

UIrene: “Njengokuba kufuna ixesha nenyameko ukwenza igadi entle, kukwanjalo nangobuhlobo. Qala ngokuzimisela ukuba ngumhlobo wokwenene. Yiba nobubele nomdla kwabanye. Yaye kulungele ukuncama ixesha lakho xa kuyimfuneko.”

ULuis Alfonso: “Abantu bale mihla bacingela iziqu zabo kunokucingela abanye. Ngoko ndiyixabisa gqitha into yokubona umntu ebonisa umdla wokwenene kum engalindelanga mbuyekezo.”

ITHINI IBHAYIBHILE?

“Kanye njengoko nifuna abantu benze kuni, yenzani ngendlela efanayo kubo. Ziqheliseni ukupha, yaye abantu baya kunipha.” (Luka 6:31, 38) Apha uYesu ukhuthaza ukuba sibacingele abanye yaye sibe nobubele kubo. Oko kuya kukwenza ube ngumhlobo wokwenene. Ukuba ukulungele ukubanceda abahlobo bakho ngaphandle kokufuna imbuyekezo, oko kuya kubenza bakuthande ngakumbi.

2. Ncokola Nomhlobo Wakho

Ubuhlobo benu abunakuqina ukuba anincokoli rhoqo. Ngoko thethani ngezinto enizithandayo. Mamela xa umhlobo wakho ethetha, yaye luhlonele uluvo lwakhe. Mncome yaye umkhuthaze xa kufanelekile. Maxa wambi, kusenokufuneka umcebise okanye umluleke umhlobo wakho, ibe akusoloko kulula ukwenjenjalo. Kodwa ukuba ungumhlobo onyanisekileyo uya kuba nesibindi sokumluleka nokumnceda ngobuchule umhlobo wakho.

OKO KULINDELEKILEYO KUMHLOBO

UJuan: “Umhlobo wokwenene umele akwazi ukuluchaza ngokukhululekileyo uluvo lwakhe, kodwa angacaphuki xa ungavumelani naye.”

UEunice: “Ndibaxabisa gqitha abahlobo abakulungeleyo ukuchitha ixesha kunye nam yaye bandimamele, ingakumbi xa ndineengxaki.”

USilvina: “Abahlobo bokwenene baya kukuxelela inyani—nokuba iyakrakra—kuba bakukhathalele.”

ITHINI IBHAYIBHILE?

“Wonke umntu umele akhawuleze ukuva, acothe ukuthetha, acothe ukuqumba.” (Yakobi 1:19) Abahlobo bokwenene bayamxabisa umntu omamelayo xa bethetha naye. Kodwa ke, ukuqhabalaka wedwa kuya kwenza abanye bavakalelwe kukuba ucinga ukuba ubhetele kunabo. Ngoko mamela xa umhlobo wakho efuna ukuphalaz’ imbilini yakhe kuwe. Yaye ungacaphuki xa ekuxelela inyani. IMizekeliso 27:6 ithi: “Amanxeba [omhlobo] othandayo athembekile.”

 3. Sukulindela Okungaphaya Kumhlobo Wakho

Okukhona buqina ubuhlobo, kokukhona buya kuqapheleka ubuthathaka bakhe. Abahlobo bethu abafezekanga njengathi. Ngoko ke asimele silindele ukuba abahlobo bethu bangazenzi iimpazamo. Kunoko, kubalulekile ukubancoma xa besenza izinto ezintle size sizamkele iimpazamo zabo.

OKO KULINDELEKILEYO KUMHLOBO

USamuel: “Maxa wambi sibadlel’ indlala abanye ngokuthi sibagwebe ngokungeyomfuneko. Xa sikhumbula ukuba nathi siyazenza iimpazamo, kuya kuba lula ukubaxolela abanye.”

UDaniel: “Yamkele into yokuba abahlobo bakho baya kuzenza iimpazamo. Xa kuvela iingxaki, zicombululeni ngokukhawuleza nize nizame ukuziphosa kwelokulibala.”

ITHINI IBHAYIBHILE?

Ngaba ukulungele ukuxolela?—Kolose 3:13, 14

“Sonke siyakhubeka izihlandlo ezininzi. Ukuba kukho nabani na ongakhubeki zwini, lowo uyindoda egqibeleleyo, ekwaziyo ukuwubamba ngomkhala kwanomzimba wayo uphela.” (Yakobi 3:2) La mazwi anokusinceda sibaqonde ngakumbi abahlobo bethu. Yaye oko kunokusenza sizibethe ngoyaba iimpazamo zabo ezingenamsebenzi, endaweni yokucaphuka. IBhayibhile ithi: “Qhubekani ninyamezelana yaye nixolelana ngesisa ukuba nabani na unesizathu sokukhalazela omnye. . . . Ke, phezu kwazo zonke ezi zinto, yambathani uthando, kuba lungumxokelelwane ogqibeleleyo womanyano.”Kolose 3:13, 14.

 4. Hlobana Nabantu Abahlukahlukeneyo

Yinyaniso into yokuba simele sibakhethe abahlobo. Kodwa oko akuthethi kuthi simele sikhethe oontanga bethu okanye uhlobo oluthile lwabantu kuphela njengabahlobo. Ukuxuba abantu abakubudala nabaneemvelaphi ezahlukahlukeneyo, kunokuba yingenelo ngokwenene.

OKO KULINDELEKILEYO KUMHLOBO

U-Unai: “Ukuba nabahlobo abalingana nawe nabathanda izinto ozithandayo, kufana nqwa nokunxiba kuphela impahla enombala omnye owuthandayo. Noba uwuthanda kangakanani na loo mbala wempahla, ekuhambeni kwexesha uza kukudika.”

UFunke: “Ukuba nabahlobo abangafaniyo kundenze ndakhula. Ndiye ndaba nabahlobo abangalinganiyo ngeminyaka nabasuka kwiindawo ezingafaniyo, nto leyo endenze ndangeneka; yaye nabahlobo bam bayayixabisa loo nto.”

Ngaba ukulungele ukuthanda zonke iintlobo zabantu?—2 Korinte 6:13

ITHINI IBHAYIBHILE?

“Ngoko ke, njengembuyekezo—ndithetha njengakubantwana bam—ndisithi, phangalalani ngokunjalo nani.” (2 Korinte 6:13) IBhayibhile isikhuthaza ukuba sithande zonke iintlobo zabantu. Ukuba nabahlobo abahlukahlukeneyo kunokukwenza uphangalale yaye uthandwe ngabantu.

 

Funda Okungakumbi

Ngumntu Onjani Umhlobo Wokwenene?

Kulula ukufumana abahlobo abangakuthandiyo kodwa ungabafumana njani aba bokwenyaniso?