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MUKAI! JANUARY 2013

 NYAYA IRI PAKAVHA

Kudzidzisa Vana Kuti Vaitire Vamwe Mutsa

Kudzidzisa Vana Kuti Vaitire Vamwe Mutsa

ZUVA rimwe nerimwe tinowana mikana yakawanda yokuti tiitire vamwe mutsa. Asi zvinoratidza sokuti, vakawanda vanongozvifunga ivo voga. Izvi zvinonyatsooneka kwose kwose. Vamwe vanotsotsa vamwe zvinosiririsa, vamwe vanotyaira vasingafungi vamwe, vamwe vanotaura mashoko akaora kunyange kuita hasha dzisingadzoreki.

Mudzimba dzakawanda vazhinji vane kapfungwa kokuda kuita zvakavanakira vasingafungi vamwe. Somuenzaniso, murume nomudzimai vanorambana nokuti zvimwe murume anenge achiti mudzimai waakaroora haaiti. Kana kuti mudzimai ndiye anenge achiti murume wandakaroorana naye haaiti. Nokusaziva vamwe vabereki vanogona kudyara kapfungwa kokungozvifunga muvana vavo. Sei? Vangaita izvi nokungobvumira zvose zvose zvinodiwa nemwana wavo uye kusamutsiura paanenge achida kutsiurwa.

Asiwo vamwe vabereki vari kudzidzisa vana vavo kuti vafungewo vamwe kwete kungozvifunga ivo chete, uye izvi zviri kushanda. Vana vanofungawo vamwe kazhinji vanoita shamwari dzemakore uye ushamwari hwacho hunenge hwakanaka. Kazhinji kacho vanozova vanhu vanogutsikana. Nemhaka yei? Nokuti sezvinotaurwa neBhaibheri, “kupa kune mufaro mukuru kupfuura kugamuchira.”—Mab 20:35.

Kana uri mubereki, ungabatsira sei vana vako kuti vazova vanhu vane mutsa uye kuti vasakanganiswa nemafungiro okuzvifunga akazara munyika? Chimboona misungo mitatu ingaita kuti vana vako vave nepfungwa dzokungozvifunga uye nzira dzaungashandisa kuti vasabatwa nemisungo iyi.

 1 Kunyaya kumurumbidza

Dambudziko. Vanoongorora vakaona kuti pane dambudziko riri kuitika: Vechiduku vakawanda vanopinda mabasa vaine pfungwa yokuda zvinzvimbo, kunyange vasina kana chavaita chinoita kuti vakodzere kuwana chinzvimbo chacho. Vamwe vanofunga kuti vachakurumidza kukwidziridzwa pabasa kunyange vasina kudzidzira basa racho. Vamwe vanozviona sevanokosha chaizvo uye vanoda kuremekedzwa uye vanoora mwoyo pavanoona kuti havasi kubatwa semabatirwo avanga vachifunga kuti vanofanira kuitwa.

Chii chinozvikonzera? Dzimwe nguva marererwo akaitwa munhu ndiwo anoita kuti ave munhu anoda zvezvinzvimbo. Somuenzaniso, vamwe vabereki vakanganiswa pfungwa nezviri kuitika munyika zvinoratidza kuti vanhu vanoda mukurumbira. Zvinoita sokuti tsika iyi yakabaya ikatyokera: Kana kurumbidza mwana kuchiita kuti aite zvakanaka, kunyanya kumurumbidza kuchaita kuti aite zvakanakisisa. Chavanenge vachireva nemashoko aya ndechokuti, kutsiura mwana kana kumuratidza kuti atadza, kunomudzosera kumashure. Nyika iri kukurudzira kuti vanhu vanyanye kuzvifunga pachavo. Saka kana mubereki akasadzidzisa vana mafungiro aya zvinoonekwa sokuti ari kutadza basa rake somubereki. Vabereki vari kuudzwa kuti vasambofa vakaita kuti vana vavo vaone sevari kutadza.

Saka vanababa nanamai vari kubva varumbidza vana vavo zvakanyanya kunyange pasina chine musoro chaitwa nevana. Chose chose chinenge chagonekwa nemwana anobva arumbidzwa, uye akakanganisa hazvimbotaurwi, zvinoita sokuti hapana chaitika. Vabereki vakadaro vanofunga kuti chinoita kuti vana vavo vazvione sevanhu kuvarumbidza pane chose chavaita uye kusataura kana kuri kuti vaita zvakaipa. Chinonyanya kukosha kwavari kuita kuti vana vafare panzvimbo pokuvadzidzisa kuti vaitewo chinhu chine musoro chavanozofara nacho.

Zvinotaurwa neBhaibheri. Bhaibheri rinoratidza kuti zvakanaka kurumbidza ndokunge pane chine musoro chaitwa. (Mateu 25:19-21) Asi kurumbidza vana nechinangwa chokungoda kuvafadza zvinozoita kuti vakure vakavhiringidzika pfungwa. Bhabheri rinoti: “Kana munhu achifunga kuti iye chimwe chinhu asi iye asiri chinhu, ari kunyengera pfungwa dzake.” (VaGaratiya 6:3) Ndokusaka Bhaibheri richiudza vabereki kuti: “Usarega kuranga mwana; ukamuranga neshamhu, haafi.” *Zvirevo 23:13, Bhaibheri Dzvene muChiShona Chanhasi.

“Usanyanya kufunga kuti uri nani kudarika vamwe. Asi iva nemwero.”—VaRoma 12:3, Good News Translation

Zvamungaita. Kana mwana akakanganisa mutsiurei uye akaitawo zvakanaka nyatsomurumbidzai. Regai kungorumbidza mwana kunyange pasina chaaita muchityira kuti mwana anozoora mwoyo. Kuita izvi kazhinji hakushandi. “Kuti unyatsogutsikana nezvauri kuita hunge uri kushandisa matarenda ako uye ruzivo rwako, kwete kungoudzwa kuti uri muhombe ipo pasina chawaita,” rinodaro bhuku rinonzi Generation Me.

 2 Kunyanya kumudzivirira

Dambudziko. Vechiduku vakawanda vari kupinda mabasa vanoratidza kuti havakwanisi kutarisana nematambudziko anoitika. Vamwe vanogumbuka kana vakangoita sevati shorwei. Vamwe vakaoma kufadza, kuti vafare vanoda kuti vaitirwe zvinhu zvinoenderana nezvavanoda. Somuenzaniso, mubhuku rinonzi Escaping the Endless Adolescence, Dr. Joseph Allen vanotaura nezvemumwe mukomana aitsvaka basa akati: “Zvinoratidza sokuti pane dzimwe nguva dzokuti mabasa anombosvika pakusanakidza, ini handidi basa rakadaro.” Dr. Allen vanonyora kuti: ‘Mashoko emukomana uyu anoratidza kuti haazivi kuti pamabasa ose anoitwa, pane dzimwe nguva dzaasinganakidzi. Zvinondishamisa kuti munhu unosvika pazera remakore 23 usingazivi kuti ndizvo zvinoitika kumabasa!’

Chii chinozvikonzera? Mumakore achangopfuura, vabereki vakawanda vaiona sokuti vanofanira kudzivirira vana vavo pachinhu chose. Mwana wenyu afoira here bvunzo? Munobva mapindira munyaya yacho muchiti mudzidzisi wake haasi kuita basa. Mwana wenyu asungwa nemhaka yokusatyaira zvakanaka mumugwagwa here? Munobva mamubhadharira faindi. Mwana wenyu arambana nemunhu waanga achidanana naye here? Munobva mashora munhu waanga achidanana naye muchiti ndiye ane mhosva.

Ichokwadi hacho kuti zviri muropa kuti mude kudzivirira mwana wenyu, asi kunyanya kumudzivirira kunoita kuti afunge kuti chero chaada kuita hapana chinomuwana. ‘Panzvimbo pokuti vadzidze kuti kuora mwoyo kana kuti kurwadziwa pamusana pezvavaita hakurevi kuti nyika yaguma, vana vakadaro vanokura vachinyanya kuzvifunga kudarika kufunga vamwe uye vachifunga kuti vabereki vavo nevamwe vanhu vanofanira kuvaitira zvinhu zvose zvavanoda,’ rinodaro bhuku rinonzi Positive Discipline for Teenagers.

Zvinotaurwa neBhaibheri. Muupenyu zvinhu hazvigari zviri muchechetere. Bhaibheri rinoti: “Zvinhu zvakaipa zvinoitika kumunhu wose!” (Muparidzi 9:11, Easy-to-Read Version) Izvi zvinosanganisira vanhu vakanaka. Somuenzaniso, muapostora Pauro akatsungirira matambudziko akasiyana-siyana paaiita ushumiri hwake. Kusangana kwaakaita nematambudziko iwayo kwakatomubatsira! Akanyora kuti: “Ndakadzidza kugutsikana, mumamiriro ezvinhu ose andinenge ndiri. . . . Ndakadzidza zvazvinoreva kuva akaguta nokuva ane nzara, zvose zviri zviviri kuva nezvizhinji uye kushayiwa.”—VaFiripi 4:11, 12.

Zvamungaita. Muchitarisa zera revana venyu, edzai kutevedzera zano reBhaibheri rokuti: “Mumwe nomumwe anofanira kutakura mutoro wake.” (VaGaratiya 6:5, Bhaibheri Dzvene muChiShona Chanhasi) Kana mwana wenyu akasungwa nokuti anga asiri kutyaira zvakanaka mumugwagwa, zvinenge zvakanaka kuti iye azvibhadharire faindi. Kana mwana wenyu akafoira kuchikoro, izvi zvinogona kumubatsira kuti amuke, nguva inotevera ashande nesimba. Kana mwana wenyu akarambana nemunhu waanga achidanana naye, munyaradzei asi pava paya mozomubatsira kuti azvibvunze mibvunzo yakadai sokuti, ‘Pane zvaitika izvi pane zvinoratidza here kuti ndichiri kumbofanira kukura?’ Vana vanogadzirisa zvavanenge vakanganisa vanokura vari vanhu vanogona kuzogadzirisa matambudziko muupenyu uye vanoziva zvavanoita kudarika vaya vaiitirwa zvinhu nevamwe.

“Munhu mumwe nomumwe ngaaedze basa rake amene, ipapo angazvirumbidza pamusoro pake.”—VaGaratiya 6:4

 3 Chose chaada munomupa

Dambudziko. Imwe ongororo yakaitwa yevechiduku yakaratidza kuti 81 vacho pa100 voga voga vakati chinhu chinokosha muupenyu hwavo kuva ‘munhu akapfuma’ kuratidza kuti pfungwa yokubatsira vamwe iri kure navo. Asi kudzingirirana nepfuma hakuiti kuti munhu agutsikane. Imwe ongororo yakatoratidza kuti vanhu vanopedza nguva yavo pakutsvaka zvinhu muupenyu ndivo vanhu vanonyanya kugara vakaora mwoyo uye vasingafari. Uyewo vari pangozi huru yokubatwa nezvirwere.

Chii chinozvikonzera? Dzimwe mhuri dzinenge dzichifarira kuva nezvinhu zvakawanda uye zvichangoburwa. “Vabereki vanoda kuti vana vavo vafare nokuvatengera zvinhu zvakawanda-wanda,” rinodaro bhuku rinonzi The Narcissism Epidemic. ‘Hongu vana vachafara asi kwenguva pfupi. Vanenge vava kutoda kutengerwa zvimwe.’

Vanoshambadzira zvinhu vari kumhanyamhanya kuti vave nezvinhu zvinodiwa nevatengi. Vanoita sevanotaura kuti ‘Ichi ndicho chinhu chekwamberi manje, unofanira kutova nacho.’ Vechiduku vakawanda vakatevedzera zvinotaurwa nevashambadziri ava uye iye zvino vari muzvikwereti havachakwanisi kubhadhara zvinhu zvavaimbonzi zvinhu zvekwamberi.

Zvinotaurwa neBhaibheri. Bhaibheri rinobvuma kuti mari inokosha. (Muparidzi 7:12) Asiwo rinonyevera kuti “kuda mari ndiwo mudzi wezvinhu zvinokuvadza zvemarudzi ose.” Rinobva rawedzera kuti: “Vachitevera rudo irworwo, vamwe . . . vakazvibaya pose pose nokurwadziwa kuzhinji.” (1 Timoti 6:10) Bhaibheri rinotikurudzira kuti tisanyanya kutsvaka pfuma asi kuti tigutsikane nezvinodiwa zvinoita kuti munhu ararame.—1 Timoti 6:7, 8.

“Vaya vakatsunga kupfuma vanowira mumuedzo nomumusungo nomukuchiva zvinhu zvizhinji zvoupenzi nezvinokuvadza.”—1 Timoti 6:9

Zvamungaita. Semubereki, imboonai maonero amunoita mari uye zvainokwanisa kutenga. Zvinhu zvinokosha ngazvigare zviri pokutanga, uye batsirai vana venyu kuti vaitewo izvozvo. Bhuku rambotaurwa rinonzi The Narcissism Epidemic rinoti: “Vabereki nevana vanogona kukurukura nyaya dzakadai sokuti ‘Inguva ipi yakanakisisa yokutenga zvinhu? Ndeipi nguva isina kunaka kutenga?’ ‘Chii chinonzi interest?’ ‘Ndirini pawakatenga chimwe chinhu nemhaka yokuti mumwe munhu akanga ati unofanira kuchitenga”

Chenjera kuti usatenga zvinhu zvakawanda sevharamuromo kumatambudziko anenge achida kukurukurwa. “Kutenga zvinhu nechinangwa chokuda kuvhara matambudziko anenge aripo haisi nzira kwayo yokugadzirisa zvinhu,” rinodaro bhuku rinonzi The Price of Privilege. “Matambudziko anoda kugarirwa pasi okurukurwa zvakanakanaka kwete nokutungamidza mari mberi.”

^ ndima 11 Bhaibheri harikurudziri kuti mwana arangwe zvokukuvadzwa kana kuti kumushungurudza. (VaEfeso 4:29, 31; 6:4) Chinangwa chokuranga ndechokudzidzisa kwete kutapudza hasha dzomubereki.

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