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URWARUKA RURIBAZA

Mboneka gute?

Mboneka gute?

Kubera iki ukwiye kuba maso ku kuntu wambara? Kubera ko bigira ico bivuze ku bikwerekeye. None abantu baravye ukuntu wambaye baca babona iki?

 Amakosa atatu akomeye ajanye n’inyambaro be n’ingene woyirinda

Ikosa rya 1: Kureka ibimenyeshamakuru bikagushingira ukuntu ukwiye kuboneka

Uwukiri muto yitwa Theresa avuga ati: “Rimwe na rimwe ndakwegerwa n’umuderi ugezweho kubera nabonye bawuhayanisha cane. Igihe ubwonko buba bwuzuyemwo amashusho y’abantu bambaye umuderi kanaka, ntivyoroha ko wirinda kujana na wo.”

Abakobwa si bo bonyene bakwegērwa n’ibihayanishwa. Igitabu kimwe (The Everything Guide to Raising Adolescent Boys) kivuga giti: “Abahungu na bo nyene baripfuza kujana n’ibigezweho. N’igihe baba ata ho barigeza, usanga banohokera ibintu bibagenewe biba biriko biragurishwa.”

Ico ukwiye gukora: Bibiliya ivuga iti: “Umuntu atazi utuntu n’utundi wese yizera ijambo ryose, mugabo umunyabwenge ararimbura intambuko ziwe.” (Imigani 14:15) Wisunze iyo ngingo ngenderwako, nusuzume witonze ivyo ubona mu mahayanishwa y’ibidandazwa. Nk’akarorero, igihe ubonye bahaya impuzu bavuga ngo “iramara” canke ngo “irabica bigacika,” nuce wibaza uti:

  • ‘Ni nde vy’ukuri ahungukira nambaye iyo mpuzu?’

  • ‘Abambona ndayambaye baca banyitiranya na bande?’

  • ‘Ukwo baca bambona kwoba vy’ukuri guhuye n’ico ndi be n’ivyo nemera?’

Impanuro: Numare indwi uraba witonze amahayanishwa y’impuzu be n’ibindi bimenyeshamakuru bikunda guhayanisha imideri igezweho. Ni agatima akahe biremesha? Hoba harimwo ubutumwa bwihishije bugenewe gutuma wumva umenga utegerezwa kujana n’impararo kanaka? Umuyabaga umwe yitwa Karen avuga ati: “Hariho akosho gakomeye ko gushaka kuboneka neza cane, kwambara neza cane no kwerekana umubiri wawe wiyumvira ko ari mwiza cane. Abahaya ibidandazwa bazi ico kintu baroroherwa no kwifatira abakiri bato.”

Ikosa rya 2: Kujana n’impararo kugira gusa umere nk’abandi.

Umuyabaga umwe yitwa Manuel avuga ati: “Igihe hari impuzu iharawe, bose baca bashaka kuyambara. Utayambaye, baca bagucishamwo ijisho.” Ivyo umuyabaga yitwa Anna aravyemera. Avuga ati: “Umuderi ubwawo nta kibi cawo, ikibi ni ugushaka kumera nk’abandi.”

Ico ukwiye gukora: Bibiliya ivuga iti: “Mureke gushushanywa n’ivy’iki gihe.” (Abaroma 12:2) Wisunze iyo mpanuro, nurabe witonze aho ubika impuzu maze wibaze uti:

  • ‘Ni ibiki ahanini nisunga mu guhitamwo impuzu?’

  • ‘Kuba zahinguwe n’abantu canke amashirahamwe rurangiranwa bihambaye ukungana iki kuri jewe?’

  • ‘Noba nshaka gutangaza abantu mu kuntu nambara?’

Impanuro: Aho kuraba gusa ko impuzu zoba zigezweho ugaca uzigura canke ko zoba zarataye igihe ugaca uzinuba, ubona gute uravye kandi ko zoba zituma wiyizigira kandi ugatekana? Uko urushiriza gutekana mu mutima ni ko uzorushiriza kudatwarwa n’icipfuzo co kumera nk’abandi.

Ikosa rya 3: Kwiyumvira ngo ‘izivyura inambu cane ni zo nziza cane.’

Umwigeme umwe yitwa Jennifer yiyemerera ati: “Ntabeshe, rimwe na rimwe uragerageza abandi iyo wambaye impuzu ikabura, nk’igihe ari ngufi cane canke igufata cane.”

Ico ukwiye gukora: Bibiliya ivuga ko ‘ugushaza kwacu kudakwiye kuba ukw’inyuma, ahubwo ko gukwiye kuba wa muntu yihishije wo mu mutima.’ (1 Petero 3:3, 4) Wisunze iyo mpanuro, niwiyumvire igikwegera cane abantu ico ari co: bwoba ari ubwiza bw’inyuma canke ubw’imbere mu mutima?

Impanuro: Ikintu cogufasha kuruta ibindi mu bijanye n’imideri ni urupfasoni. Ego ni ko, ico si ikintu gikundwa na benshi muri iki gihe. Mugabo nubizirikaneko muri ubu buryo:

Woba umaze kuyaga n’umuntu avuga menshi kandi aguma avuga ibimwerekeye gusa? Ikibabaje, uwo muntu yoshobora kutamenya ko ariko arakwigizayo!

Cokimwe n’ikiyago, ukuntu wambara kurashobora kugaragaza ko wikwegerako, bigatuma abandi bakwinuba

Igihe wambaye ata rupfasoni, uca umera nk’uwo muntu. Ni nk’aho uba uriko urabwira abandi uti: ‘Nimundabe!’ Ivyo vyoshobora gutuma uboneka ko udatekanye be n’uko wiyumvira ivyawe gusa. Birashobora kandi kwerekana ko uriko urondera hasi hejuru uwogukunda, mbere naho yoba atabereye.

Aho kugenda uhayanisha ikintu utagomba kugurisha, niwambare mu rupfasoni. Umuyabaga umwe yitwa Monica avuga ati: “Kwambara mu rupfasoni ntibisobanura ko utegerezwa kwambara nka nyokuru. Bisobanura gusa yuko wiyubaha ukubaha n’abandi.”

Raba kandi

Raba n'ibindi

Kuki noba maso ku bigeme berekanwa mu binyamakuru?—Igice ca 1: Vyerekeye abakobwa

Benshi mu biyumvira ko bariko berekana uko bameze usanga bariko bigana abandi gusa.

Kuki noba maso ku bahungu berekanwa mu binyamakuru?—Igice ca 2: Vyerekeye abahungu

Kwigana ukuntu abahungu berekanwa mu binyamakuru bameze vyoba bituma abandi batagushima?

Woba urazwa ishinga cane n’uko usa?

Nimba udashima uko usa, ni igiki wokora kugira ubone ibikwerekeye ku rugero?