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GALAMUKANI! APRIL 2013

 MFUNDO ZOTHANDIZA MABANJA | BANJA

Kodi Mungapewe Bwanji Kulankhula Mawu Achipongwe?

Kodi Mungapewe Bwanji Kulankhula Mawu Achipongwe?

ZOMWE ZIMACHITIKA

Nthawi zonse mukasemphana maganizo ndi mwamuna kapena mkazi wanu mumalozana chala. Mukafuna kulankhulana, mawu ake amakhala achipongwe moti simuona ngati ndi vuto kulankhulana choncho.

Ngati mumalankhulana choncho m’banja mwanu, dziwani kuti mukhoza kuthetsa vutoli. Koma choyamba mukufunika kudziwa chimene chimachititsa kuti muzikangana komanso muyenera kudziwa ubwino wothetsa vutolo.

ZOMWE ZIMACHITITSA

Mmene munakulira. Anthu ambiri anakulira m’mabanja omwe ankakonda kulankhulana mawu onyoza. Choncho anthu otere akalowa m’banja amalankhula mawu achipongwe potengera makolo awo.

Mafilimu. Mafilimu komanso masewero ena a pa TV amasonyeza anthu akulankhulana mawu achipongwe mwanthabwala. Zimenezi zimachititsa anthu oonera kuganiza kuti kulankhula mawu achipongwe kulibe vuto lililonse.

Chikhalidwe. Anthu azikhalidwe zina amakhulupirira kuti “mwamuna weniweni” azisonyeza mphamvu kuti mkazi wake asamamuderere. Komanso m’zikhalidwe zina amakhulupirira kuti mkazi ayenera kumalankhula mwaukali kuti asamaoneke wotsika. Ndiye anthu otere amati akasemphana maganizo imakhala ngati nkhondo chifukwa amangolankhulana zachipongwe zokhazokha.

Kaya anthu okwatirana amakangana pa zifukwa zotani, mfundo ndi yoti khalidwe lolankhulana mawu achipongwe lingachititse kuti ukwati wawo uthe komanso kuti azidwaladwala. Ena amanena kuti mawu amakhala opweteka kwambiri kuposa kumenyedwa. Mwachitsanzo, mkazi wina wapabanja yemwe mwamuna wake ankakonda kumumenya komanso kumunyoza anati: “Mwamuna wanga akamandilalatira ndinkamva kupweteka kwambiri mumtima kuposa mmene ndinkamvera akamandimenya.”

Kodi mungatani ngati banja lanu layamba kusokonekera chifukwa cholankhulana mawu achipongwe?

 ZIMENE MUNGACHITE

Muziganizira mmene mnzanu akumvera. Muzidziyerekezera kuti ndinu mkazi kapena mwamuna wanuyo ndipo muziganizira mmene akumvera chifukwa cha zimene mukulankhula. Ganizirani zimene munamulankhula nthawi inayake zimene mukuona kuti zinam’pweteka kwambiri. Musaganizire kwambiri mawu enieni amene munalankhula koma mmene zinam’khudzira mutalankhula mawu amenewo. Kodi mukuganiza kuti mukanalankhula mawu otani omwe mukuona kuti sakanam’pweteka? Baibulo limanena kuti: “Kuyankha modekha kumabweza mkwiyo, koma mawu opweteka amayambitsa mkwiyo.”—Miyambo 15:1.

Muzitengera zitsanzo za mabanja ena. Ngati mumalankhula mawu achipongwe potengera anthu ena, pezani anthu a chitsanzo chabwino omwe mungatengere khalidwe lawo. Muzitsanzira anthu apabanja omwe amalankhulana bwino.—Lemba lothandiza: Afilipi 3:17.

Yambiraninso kumukonda ngati mmene munkachitira kale. Nthawi zambiri munthu akamalankhula mawu achipongwe zimakhala zochokera mumtima. Choncho kuti muzilankhula bwino, muzionetsetsa kuti nthawi zonse mukuganizira zabwino zokhudza mkazi kapena mwamuna wanu. Ganizirani zinthu zambiri zosangalatsa zimene munkachitira limodzi. Mungaonenso zithunzi zanu zakale. Ganizirani zimene munkasangalala nazo. Ndi zinthu ziti zimene zinkachititsa kuti muzikondana kwambiri?—Lemba lothandiza: Luka 6:45.

Muzinena momasuka mmene mukumvera. M’malo momulankhula mawu achipongwe mkazi kapena mwamuna wanu, fotokozani mwaulemu mmene nkhaniyo yakukhudzirani. Mwachitsanzo mutamuuza mwamuna kapena mkazi wanu kuti, “Mukamachita zinthu musanandiuze ndimaona ngati simumandiganizira,” sangayankhe mawu achipongwe kusiyana n’kunena kuti, “Ndi mmene mulili inu! Nthawi zonse m’mangopanga zimene mwaganiza osandiuza.”—Lemba lothandiza: Akolose 4:6.

Dikirani mitima ikhale pansi. Ngati mwaona kuti mwayamba kulankhulana mopsa mtima, mungachite bwino kusiya kaye kukambirana. Sikulakwa kuchokapo kaye ngati mwaona kuti mwatsala pang’ono kukangana. Mungapitirizenso kukambirana nthawi ina mitima yanu itakhala pansi.—Lemba lothandiza: Miyambo 17:14.

Nthawi zambiri munthu akamalankhula mawu achipongwe zimakhala zochokera mumtima

Onaninso

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