UKALU

Lunga umwe ambile ngwenyi: “Omu twalimbachile, ami napuwami katwatachikijile kanawa omu twatela kusolwela kavumbiko. Kacheshi nakulumbununa nge vishinganyeka vyaumwe vyapwile vyakwoloka kuhambakana vyamukwavoko, oloze vyalihandunwine kaha. Ngwashinganyekelenga ngwami puwami atelelele kunguvumbika chikuma muhanjikiso yenyi.”

Pwevo umwe ambile ngwenyi: “Lwola lumwe vangulelelele muchisemwa muze vatu veji kuhanjikilanga helu, nakuhanjika oku vanakupihisa kumeso, nakuvatwijiza vakwavo nge vali nakuhanjika. Hanjikiso kana twayimwenenga kupwa yakavumbi. Oloze chisemwa kana chalihandununa chikuma nachisemwa chalunga lyami.”

Kavumbi kasakiwa muulo lwola lwosena. Munahase kusolola ngachilihi ngwenu mwavumbika muka-mahyenu?

VYUMA MWATELA KUTACHIKIZA

Malunga vasakiwa kuvavumbika mwomwo yavyuma vimwe. Mbimbiliya yalweza malunga ngwayo: “Enu nawa mutu himutu azangenga pwevo lyenyi nganomu alizanga ivene.” Yamba nawa ngwayo: “Pwevo atela kupwa nakalemesa chikuma kuli lunga lyenyi.” (Wavaka-Efwesu 5:33) Numba tuhu malunga namapwevo vasaka kuvazanga nakuvavumbika, oloze malunga vasaka kuvavumbika chikuma. Lunga umwe walijina lyaCarlos * ambile ngwenyi: “Malunga vamona nge vakwechi uhashi wakukumisa vikokojola, naukalu, nakuzakama kanawa tanga. Nge pwevo mwavumbikanga lunga lyenyi mwomwo yakulinga vyuma kanevi, kaha vosena navanganyala chikuma.” Pwevo umwe walijina lyaCorrine ambile ngwenyi: “Lunga lyami eji kunguzanganga chikuma kachi nge ngunamuvumbika.”

Mapwevo navakiko vasakiwa kuvavumbika. Chikupu vene lunga keshi kuhasa kuzanga puwenyi uze kavumbikako. Lunga umwe walijina lyaDaniel ambile ngwenyi: “Ngwasaka kuvumbika vyuma mwashinganyeka puwami navize mwahanjika. Ngwasaka nawa kumwivwishisa kachi nge tunalimbalaka. Kuhona kwivwishisa ovyo puwami eji kwivwilanga ngocho kachalumbununa nge kangweshi kuhasa kumuvumbikako.”

Vatu vamona kavumbi mujijila jakulisezaseza. Kupwa nakavumbi kachapwa kaha kushinganyeka ngwetu twavumbika muka-mahyetuko, oloze chapwa kulingisa muka-mahyetu amone chikupu ngwenyi twamuvumbika. Echi chikiko chishina alinangwile pwevo uze twavulukanga kumaputukilo mukamutwe kachihande kakwamba ngwavo “Ukalu”. Ambile ngwenyi: “Numba tuhu kangwashinganyekele ngwami kangwatwama nakavumbiko, oloze nge muka-mahyami angumwene ngwenyi mukiko ngwapwa, kaha ngwetelele kwalumunako vilinga vyami.”

 VYUMA MWATELA KULINGA

  • Sonekenu vyuma vitatu eji kulinganga muka-mahyenu vize vyamilingisa mumuzange chikuma. Vyuma namusoneka vinahase kumikafwa mangana muvumbike chikuma muka-mahyenu.

  • Muchalumingo chimwe kekesenu vilinga vyenu (keshi vyamuka-mahyenuko) muvyuma vino.

Hanjikiso yenu. Kuhehwojola chimwe chasolola nge “vaka-kulimbata vaze vawahilila, nakutwama kanawa muulo wavo, veji kuhanjikanga vyuma vitanu vyamwaza hali muka-mahyamutu numba tuhu omu valikokojwesele umwe ahanjikile mazu amapi kuli mukwavo. Vaka-kulimbata vaze kavahanjika vyuma vyamwaza hali muka-mahyavoko vakiko vavula kulilukulula.” *Lushimbi lwamuMbimbiliya: Vishimo 12:18.

Lihulisenu ngwenu: ‘Kutala ngweji kuhanjikanga nakavumbi kuli muka-mahyami tahi? Kutala ngwasaka kutokomenya lika hatutenga twenyi nakuhona kumusangejeka tahi? Uno ngweji kuhanjikanga ngachilihi kachi nge kuliko ukalu umwe?’ Uno muka-mahyenu nahase kwitavila vyuma namukumbulula tahi?—Lushimbi lwamuMbimbiliya: Wavaka-Kolose 3:13.

Esekenu echi: Fwilenu kusangejekanga muka-mahyenu numba halikumbi kamwe. Mwakulingila: Shinganyekenu havyuma vyamwaza vize mwamwene hakavanga kuli muka-mahyenu. Lijilisenu kulwezanga muka-mahyenu vilinga atwama navyo vize mwazanga chikuma.—Lushimbi lwamuMbimbiliya: Wavaka-Kolinde 1, 8:1.

Vilinga vyenu. Pwevo umwe walijina lyaAlicia ambile ngwenyi: “Ngweji kuzatanga chikuma milimo yakukanda, kaha nge lunga lyami mwafumisa ivene malonga kumesa chipwe kulikoselawo, ngweji kwivwanga nge chikupu vene ngunyamalikita kaha nawa nguwamulemu muulo wetu.”

Lihulisenu ngwenu: ‘Kutala jila ngweji kumwenangamo muka-mahyami yasolola nge ngwamuvumbika tahi? Uno ngweji kupwanga nalwola lwakutwama hamwe namuka-mahyami tahi?’ Uno muka-mahyenu nahase kwitavila vyuma namukumbulula tahi?

Esekenu echi: Sonekenu jijila jitatu jize namusaka muka-mahyenu amisolwele kavumbi. Lwezenu muka-mahyenu naikiye asoneke. Kufumaho lihanenu mapapilo munasoneka mangana mutu himutu azachile hajijila jize nasoneka muka-mahyenyi. Fwilenu kuzachila havyuma nasoneka muka-mahyenu mangana musolole kavumbi. Nge hakachi kenu nahapwa umwe mwaputuka kusolola kavumbi, kaha mukwavo mwalinga mwomumwe.

^ par. 8 Majina amwe ali muchihande chino vanawalumuna.

^ par. 14 Omu mukiko wahanjika mukanda vavuluka ngwavo Ten Lessons to Transform Your Marriage.