Marriage and Parenthood in This Time of the End
“The time left is reduced.”—1 COR. 7:29.
1. (a) What current changes are among the things “hard to deal with”? (b) Why are changing family values of concern to us?
GOD’S Word foretold that “the time of the end” would be marked by wars, earthquakes, famines, and pestilences. (Dan. 8:17, 19; Luke 21:10, 11) The Bible also warned that this decisive period in human history would be a period of great social changes. Upheavals in family life would be among the things “hard to deal with” in these critical “last days.” (2 Tim. 3:1-4) Why are such changes of concern to us? Because they are so extensive and so powerful that they could influence how Christians today view marriage and parenthood. In what way?
2. How does the world in general view marriage and divorce?
2 Nowadays, divorce has become easy and widespread, and the divorce rate in many countries is climbing. However, we should keep clearly in mind that Jehovah God has a completely different view of marriage and divorce than the one generally accepted in the world around us. What, then, is Jehovah’s view?
3. How do Jehovah and Jesus Christ view marriage?
3 Jehovah God expects those who are married to remain faithful to their marriage vow. When he united the first man and woman in marriage, Jehovah stated that “a man . . . must stick to his wife and they must become one flesh.” Jesus Christ later repeated that statement and added: “Therefore, what God has yoked together let no man put apart.” Jesus further stated: “Whoever divorces his wife, except on the ground of fornication, and marries another commits adultery.” (Gen. 2:24; Matt. 19:3-6, 9) Hence, Jehovah and Jesus view marriage as a lifelong bond that ends only when one partner dies. (1 Cor. 7:39) Since marriage is a sacred arrangement, divorce is not to be taken lightly. In fact, God’s Word states that Jehovah hates a divorce that has no Scriptural basis. *—Read Malachi 2:13-16; 3:6.
4. Why do some young Christians regret that they rushed into marriage?
4 The ungodly world in which we live is obsessed with sex. Every day, waves of sensual images are directed at us. We cannot ignore the effect they can have on us, especially on our dear young ones in the congregation. How should young Christians react to this unwholesome influence, which can arouse sexual desire even against their will? Some have tried to deal with it by marrying at a very early age. In that way, they hope to avoid getting involved in sexual immorality. Before long, though, a number have regretted that decision. Why? Once the novelty of being married has worn off, they have realized that they and their partner have little in common when it comes to everyday matters. Understandably, such couples are then faced with a serious challenge.
5. What will help couples to remain faithful to their wedding vow? (See also footnote.)
5 Being married to someone—even a fellow Christian—who turns out to be very different from what you expected can definitely be difficult. (1 Cor. 7:28) Still, no matter how challenging the situation is, true Christians know that an unscriptural divorce is not an acceptable solution to problems associated with an unhappy union. Hence, those who keep on working hard to preserve their marriage because they want to remain faithful to their wedding vow deserve respect and loving help from the Christian congregation. *
6. How should young Christians view the prospect of marriage?
6 Are you young and still unmarried? If so, how should you regard the prospect of marriage? You can avoid much heartache if you wait until you are physically, mentally, and spiritually ready for marriage before you start a romantic relationship with a Christian of the opposite sex. Of course, the Scriptures do not stipulate an age for marriage. * However, the Bible does show that you do well to wait until you are past that time in life when sexual feelings are very strong. (1 Cor. 7:36) Why? Because strong sexual impulses can distort good judgment and cause you to make unwise decisions that may result in heartache later. Remember, Jehovah’s wise counsel on marriage in the Bible is for your benefit and happiness.—Read Isaiah 48:17, 18.
7. What do some young couples experience, and why can this strain the marriage?
7 Some couples who marry young find themselves expecting a child when they themselves are barely out of adolescence. They have not really had time to get to know each other properly before the arrival of the baby, who requires attention 24 hours a day. When the newborn quite naturally becomes the primary object of the mother’s attention, the young husband may feel jealous. Furthermore, sleepless nights can create tension and stress that put a strain on the couple’s relationship. They suddenly realize that they have lost much of their freedom. Now they cannot go places and do things as freely as they did before. How should they view their changed situation?
8. As what should parenthood be viewed, and why?
8 Just as marriage should be undertaken in a responsible manner, parenthood should be viewed as a God-given responsibility and privilege. Whatever adjustments the arrival of a baby may cause in the lives of a Christian couple, they should do their utmost to deal with these in a responsible way. Since Jehovah gave humans the ability to have children, parents need to view the newborn baby as “an inheritance from Jehovah.” (Ps. 127:3) A Christian mother and father will strive to assume their duties as “parents in union with the Lord.”—Eph. 6:1.
9. (a) What does raising a child involve? (b) What can the husband do to help his wife remain spiritually strong?
9 Raising a child involves years of self-sacrifice. It is a big investment in time and energy. A Christian husband needs to understand that for several years after a baby is born, his wife is likely to be distracted during meetings and she may have fewer opportunities for personal Bible study and meditation. This could have a debilitating effect on her spiritual health. Responsible parenthood requires that the husband does all he reasonably can to help to look after the child. He could try to compensate for what his wife may miss at the meetings by later discussing some of the program points with her at home. He may also share in caring for the baby to give his wife an opportunity to have a meaningful share in Kingdom preaching.—Read Philippians 2:3, 4.
10, 11. (a) How are children brought up in the “mental-regulating of Jehovah”? (b) Why do many Christian parents deserve commendation?
10 Responsible parenthood involves much more than providing the child with food, clothing, shelter, and health care. Particularly in this perilous time of the end, young ones need to learn from a tender age the moral principles by which to live. Children should be brought up “in the discipline and mental-regulating of Jehovah.” (Eph. 6:4) This “mental-regulating” involves implanting Jehovah’s thoughts in the mind of a child from its tender infancy on through the critical years of adolescence.—2 Tim. 3:14, 15.
11 When Jesus told his followers that they should “make disciples of people of all the nations,” he most certainly meant that parents should help their children to become disciples. (Matt. 28:19, 20) That is a challenge because of the pressures that this world puts on young people. Therefore, parents who succeed in rearing their children to become dedicated Christians truly deserve the warm commendation of all in the congregation. They have “conquered” the world’s influence by their faith and their faithfulness as responsible parents.—1 John 5:4.
Single or Childless for a Noble Purpose
12. Why do some Christians decide to remain single for a time?
12 Since “the time left is reduced” and “the scene of this world is changing,” God’s Word urges us to consider the advantages of singleness. (1 Cor. 7:29-31) Hence, some Christians choose to remain single for life or they decide to remain single for some years before marrying. Commendably, they do not take advantage of the freedom that singleness brings to pursue selfish interests. Many remain single in order to serve Jehovah “without distraction.” (Read 1 Corinthians 7:32-35.) Some single Christians serve as pioneers or Bethelites. A number seek to extend their usefulness to Jehovah’s organization by qualifying to attend the Ministerial Training School. In fact, those who served as full-time ministers for some time while single and then later decided to marry often feel that their marriage is still benefiting from the valuable lessons they learned during those early years.
13. Why do some Christian couples decide to refrain from having children?
13 In some parts of the world, yet another change in family life has occurred—numerous couples have decided to remain childless. Some do so for economic reasons; others do it because they want to be free to pursue a lucrative career. Among Christians, there are also couples who refrain from having children. However, they often do so to be freer to serve Jehovah. This does not mean that such couples do not enjoy a normal married life. They do. Still, they are willing to place Kingdom interests above some of the privileges that go with marriage. (1 Cor. 7:3-5) Some of those couples serve Jehovah and their brothers in the circuit and district work or at Bethel. Others serve as pioneers or as missionaries. Jehovah will not forget their work and the love they show for his name.—Heb. 6:10.
‘Tribulation in the Flesh’
14, 15. What “tribulation in their flesh” could Christian parents experience?
14 The apostle Paul told married Christians that they would have “tribulation in their flesh.” (1 Cor. 7:28) This may involve health problems for the couple, their children, or their aging parents. It may also involve difficulties and heartaches connected with the rearing of their children. As mentioned at the beginning of this article, the Bible foretold that “the last days” would bring “critical times hard to deal with.” Among the things hard to deal with would be children who are “disobedient to parents.”—2 Tim. 3:1-3.
15 Rearing children is a serious challenge for Christian parents. We are not shielded from the adverse effects of the current “critical times.” Hence, Christian parents have to wage an ongoing fight against the pernicious influence that “the system of things of this world” can have on their children. (Eph. 2:2, 3) And the battle is not always won! In case a son or a daughter of a Christian family stops serving Jehovah, it is, indeed, “tribulation” for parents who have tried to raise him or her in God’s truth.—Prov. 17:25.
“There Will Be Great Tribulation”
16. What “tribulation” did Jesus prophesy?
16 Any “tribulation” encountered within the context of marriage and childbearing will, however, be surpassed by another tribulation of far greater magnitude. In his prophecy about his presence and the conclusion of the system of things, Jesus stated: “There will be great tribulation such as has not occurred since the world’s beginning until now, no, nor will occur again.” (Matt. 24:3, 21) Jesus later revealed that a great crowd would survive this “great tribulation.” However, Satan’s system will go down fighting in an all-out final assault against Jehovah’s peaceful Witnesses. Doubtless, it will be a difficult time for all of us—adults and children alike.
17. (a) Why can we face the future with confidence? (b) What should influence our view of marriage and parenthood?
17 Nevertheless, we should not be unduly fearful about the future. Parents who are faithful to Jehovah can hope to be protected along with their young children. (Read Isaiah 26:20, 21; Zeph. 2:2, 3; 1 Cor. 7:14) For now, though, may awareness of the critical days in which we live influence how we think about marriage and parenthood in this time of the end. (2 Pet. 3:10-13) In that way, our life—whether we are single or married, with or without children—will bring honor and praise to Jehovah and to the Christian congregation.
^ par. 3 See Live With Jehovah’s Day in Mind under the subheading “He Has Hated a Divorcing,” on page 125.
^ par. 5 Those dealing with marital problems will be strengthened by reviewing such articles on marriage as found in The Watchtower of September 15, 2003, and , and , and , and Awake! of January 8, 2001.
^ par. 6 See chapter 30, “Am I Ready for Marriage?” in Questions Young People Ask—Answers That Work.
By Way of Review
• Why should young Christians not rush into marriage?
• What does raising a child involve?
• Why do many Christians remain single or if married, childless?
• What “tribulation” may Christian parents experience?
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Why is it wise for young Christians to wait to marry?
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A husband can do much to help his wife to have a meaningful share in spiritual activities
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Why do some Christian couples decide not to have children?