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Jehovah’s Witnesses

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YOUNG PEOPLE ASK

How Can I Talk to My Parents About Their Rules?

What you need: Communication skills

Communication is a vital tool that can

  • help others to understand you.

  • help you to understand why what you want is being refused.

Really, if you want to receive the privileges of a grown-up, it’s only reasonable that you develop mature communication skills. How can you do so?

Learn to control your emotions. Good communication requires self-control. The Bible states: “All his spirit is what a stupid one lets out, but he that is wise keeps it calm to the last.Proverbs 29:11.

The point? Avoid whining, sulking, slamming the door, or stomping around the house. Such behavior will probably lead to more rules—not to more freedom.

Try to see your parents’ point of view. Example: Suppose your parents are reluctant to let you attend a certain gathering. Instead of arguing, you could ask:

“What if a mature, trustworthy friend came along with me?”

Your parents may still not grant your request. But if you understand their concerns, you have a better chance of suggesting an acceptable option.

Obeying your parents’ rules is like paying off a debt to the bank—the more reliable you are, the more trust (or credit) you will receive

Build your parents’ confidence in you. Imagine a man who owes money to a bank. If he makes his payments regularly, he’ll earn the bank’s trust and the bank may even extend more credit to him in the future.

It’s similar at home. You owe your parents your obedience. So if you continually let them down, don’t be surprised if they reduce or even close your “line of credit.”

On the other hand, if you prove trustworthy—even in small things—your parents are likely to trust you more in the future.